A Loser's Winning Moment by Jason Gay

I like this article on the Nadal-Djokovic Wimbledon final. After his introduction which says how easy it is to handle winning Gay says: "But do you really want to prove yourself, to be all-time and great? Learn to lose. Lose beautifully, with class and humility. Lose like Rafael Nadal."

Further on he says:

One of the great aspects of the Nadal-Federer era is that it demolished the myth that nice guys finish last. This isn't to say the rivals don't possess bountiful egos—they do—but there has been an encouraging layer of generosity and civility to the competition. It's a little pathetic how refreshing this is. Too often, antisocial behavior in sports is excused as a side effect of championship determination.

I agree. This was one of the things that bothered me when the Williams sisters were dominating woman's tennis. When they lost they often didn't give credit to the play of their opponent. I remember seeing at least one victory speech in which one of the Williams didn't even acknowledge their opponent. I have to say that this was several years ago. I was pleasantly surprised more recently when Serena graciously handled a loss.

I'm not saying we should like losing. I certainly am not happy when I lose a tennis match. But there is nothing to be gained by belittling your partner or concocting an excuse for losing. If my goal is to improve (which it is) it won't help my effort if I deny why I lost. I'm preventing learning important lessons that could help me play better. And I also do believe my opponent is a partner at least at the level of social sports which for most of us is what we're engaged in. We're not earning our living, landing endorsement deals or vying for trophies when we play sports with friends and colleagues. This is why I used the word "partner" earlier in this paragraph. We're testing each other, partly in order to grow and improve while also enjoying the battle. The fact that Nadal, Federer and others can handle losing as well as they do supports the sentiment expressed in the first quote from Gay.